I Just Can't Lose You
by Naty L. Potter
Summary: A bit of angst made for the prompt "Percy says something that really hurts Annabeth's feelings and tries to apologize". Still unrevised, sorry.


**Prompt:** _Percy says something that really hurts Annabeth's feelings ans tried to apologize._

* * *

They were panting from all the screaming and both their faces were red with anger. The discussion had started out of something silly – so silly neither of them could remember – but somehow it had escalated in a way it never had before. Harsh things were said by both, and somehow they managed to turn every little thing into a big deal and it already seemed that they'd reached a point beyond repair.

'It seemed', though, just before Percy spoke up for the last time.

"I knew I should've chosen Calypso, don't know what made me come back to you."

Annabeth closed her ready-to-speak mouth and in a matter of seconds had lost every trace of anger she'd had before. It took around five seconds for Percy to realize what he'd said, and when he did, his anger dissipated as well.

Annabeth looked at him, unable to speak or to do anything else. She had no feelings showing, no anger or sadness, or anything, she was just there, staring, and Percy knew her enough to know that she only got that face when she heard or read something that was way too hard to understand and she needed a few seconds to assimilate it.

And then she did, and Percy wanted to kill himself when she looked down and took a deep breath, something that she only did when she was about to cry but refused to let it happen.

"Annabeth-" He tried to take a step closer and raise his arm to hold her, but she'd already passed over him holding her purse, and was now running towards the door of his apartment.

Next thing he knew he was after her, but she was faster and was already down the stairs away from his sight. Thinking quickly he went back to the apartment and ran to the balcony, where he started to climb down the emergency stairs.

He'd underestimated his girlfriend, though, and she got to the street when he was still halfway down. She had her hand over her mouth and he could clearly see that she was crying, holding her purse close to her body.

His heart panged and he tried to speed up. He had to reach her. He knew that with what he'd said it would be really hard to convince her to talk to him, but if he didn't reach her then, if she though he hadn't followed her, it would be over. He knew that.

_And that just could not happen_.

Saying that he should've chosen Calypso was probably the most stupid thing he'd ever said. Not because it was a delicate subject between them or it was it was one of the most hurtful things he could say to Annabeth, but because it wasn't even true. He hadn't thought about Calypso for years now and quite honestly thinking about her did nothing to him. There was no feeling of guilt or regret, there was truly nothing but gratitude for what she'd done for him while he was in her island.

And Annabeth… she was _that_. _That_ thing in his life that meant more than anything else, _that_ part of his life he couldn't possibly imagine living without, _that_ person that made him believe that love really did exist and that it was a wonderful thing. She was just everything and even if it meant breaking all of his bones jumping down the damn stairs to get her attention he had to reach her.

"Annabeth!" He screamed trying his best to get to the ground faster. She stopped and looked back, but it didn't seem to matter that he was climbing down emergency stairs for her, as she just resumed to her way, speeding up. "Damn!" He cursed when he noticed that, but thankfully he got to the pavement a few seconds later and ran with everything he had in him to her. She didn't expect it, so she yelped in surprise when he appeared in front of her, panting, holding both of her arms in a desperate way.

"Annabeth-" He tried again, breathing heavily.

"Let me go." She asked trying to sound fierce, but the cracking in her voice due to the crying interfered.

"No. No. I'm not letting you go." She'd meant for him to let go off her arms, but it was clear in his voice that he meant a whole lot more than just that.

"Why not? Isn't Calypso free now? You've wasted enough time being with me, already."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I said that. It was totally unplanned, uncalled, and untrue." His rough respiration made the whole thing a lot more emotional than Annabeth could've imagine."

"You clearly don't want this relationship, Percy, why tiring yourself up to mend it?" She'd been able to control her tears when she'd looked up when he screamed her name, but there were still traces of it on her face and her eyes.

"Don't say that, don't ever say that. I want this relationship, I need this relationship. I wasn't thinking when I said that, or any of the things I said before. I can't lose you now, Annabeth." His voice was so desperate that she was ready to believe he was about to cry, but after what she'd felt when he said those words she couldn't just give in.

"Just please let me go, Percy." She sighed, tired of holding up the tears. She hated crying and she absolutely hated crying in front of people, but she was too hurt to express with anything other than tears.

"I told you already I'm not letting you go. I am _not_ letting you go." He repeated the words slowly, like trying to show some hidden meaning to them. "I'm sorry, I really am truly sorry for what I said. I promise you I didn't mean a single word of it. Do you want me to swear on the River Stix? I can do that. I can also swear that I'll never leave you. I swear on-"

"Percy," She stopped his words before he did anything he could regret. A promise on the River Stix had to be analyzed before being made, the price was too high not to think of all the consequences. "Stop. There's no need to swear on the River Stix."

"No, please, don't do that." He got her hand, his eyes getting suspiciously wet, as he interpreted her tone to be one of finale. "Please, please, don't break up with me."

If the fighting and the hurtful things and the pain hadn't been so recent she might have cracked a little smile at that, but it wasn't a fun situation and it clear that both of them were suffering.

"I'm not breaking up with you." She said flatly, not sure of what she was actually feeling.

He let out his breath and it was so relieved that it actually scared her a little.

"Oh, thank gods." He hugged her tightly and hid his face on her neck, something that usually happened the other way around. "I love you."

"I love you, too." She said, unable to keep it inside oh her.

They stood there held on each other for some time, and then suddenly Annabeth felt him trembling.

"Percy? Are you crying?"

He didn't respond for a few seconds, but then he took a deep breath and said still in her shoulder. "Sorry. I just… I just can't lose you."

He'd said that before – in that conversation too, actually – but right there, at that moment, it hit her. She'd always been the needy one, even if it didn't show. _She_ was the one who'd always been left behind, so _she_ was the one that needed him to not leave her. It struck her with amazement and fear the fact that he clearly felt the same way.

"I can't lose you either." She said feeling much lighter than she had before. "So don't worry."

He held her more closely and let out a sigh. She'd forgiven him and he didn't even know why or how. He was just very glad she had and would make sure he would never hurt her like that again.


End file.
